Ode to Christina
I read between the lines
A sad girl, she feels neglected
I listen to her every song
She just likes to sing
I just like things too
I just like to imagine
Every song is a secret message to me
To rescue her
To be her secret escape
I want to hold her in my arms
To touch her, and kiss her
She finds her way into my dreams sometimes
But I screw it up you know
I am clumsy
I want her to wrap her legs around me and feel happiness
I want her to run to me like she did that night
I want her to take my hand and place it on her breast
again
I want to hear her voice talking in the dark
I want her to never stop singing
I want to move the hair out of her face
I want to look deep into her eyes
I want to find where the music comes from
I want to make her feel appreciated
I want to take her on adventures like we use to do
I want her to think about me
But mostly
I want to be her secret
What if she were to die tomorrow
I would be haunted by her siren songs
The girl next door that got away, but never could be
I would sit by her grave and play her singing
I would put real flowers there, not the plastic kind.
No.
I would drop lots of wild flower seeds on the ground
In a big spiral outwards coming from her grave
I am insurgent like that. Make the people wonder.
What magic came to rest beneath this stupid stone.
Where are you now I would whisper..
I listened to every single one of your songs
When the world passed you by and ignored you.
Did you ever know? I think you knew.
I saved every one of your songs for your children to
hear
Visit me one last time in my dreams
And sing me a new song
Boys want what they can't have
I want to taste all of you.
Too late for all that.
The color orange.
Change.
Before we are all quiet dust
Sit in your little box by the side of the road and think
like I do
Waiting stupidly on death and old age as if it brings
any thing worth
having. We are all already dead.
What does it matter if you kiss me one more time
In secret
I will not tell a soul
.
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